Comments on: Non-Guilty Pleasures [Day 11 - 30 Days to Changing Your Game]

By: Celene

Celene — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 00:24:22 +0000

Needed that, thanks!

By: tobias tinker

tobias tinker — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 16:05:29 +0000

beautiful, beautiful life-affirming post. I know several lovely, creative people who need to read this so badly… not because it's scintillatingly new but because it's so warmly, lovingly written and communicates these universal truths so clearly. I want to read this every day for a while…

By: Shelagh at Spiritus

Shelagh at Spiritus — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 00:40:31 +0000

Perfectionism and comparisonitis – thank you everyone for making me see how mcuh I have been crippled by both of these….!

More to let go of….I'll be naked soon!!

By: Shelagh at Spiritus

Shelagh at Spiritus — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 00:26:46 +0000

Irish Protestantism is pretty toxic too! All about denial of pleasure, of beauty, of any sensual experience. No decoration in church, self care is selfish…….

But at least we didn't have fish on Fridays!

By: Shelly

Shelly — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 14:13:06 +0000

I have to say, I grew up with a mother (who pretty much raised me as a single mother) – we had/have a great extended family support system… and my whole life my mother has told me “You can do whatever you want in life, you can be whatever you want to be!”

What I find interesting – even with that awesome support system – I still have found myself over the years retreating back from taking those big steps and making those difficult decisions (I always make them in the end – sometimes the right ones, sometimes not!)… but I do make them!

I think sometimes that it doesn't matter if you were raised in the most positive environment or some of the bad environments I have read about – you still are going to have your self doubts and reservations (though I freely admit and believe that those raised in households that repress creativity and independence have a DEFINITE harder time and more to 'overcome' to finally make it to the place that you are talking about – realizing that they can do it – they have it in them to do anything and should!)

What am I going to do to lessen the reservation time that I have? Read your post every time that my heart beats quickly when faced with something…. and instead of procrastinating and then eventually coming around to making the decision – I am going to just jump in and do it! Thanks!

By: Alexis Martin Neely

Alexis Martin Neely — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 11:50:54 +0000

Ava,

I have experienced Twitter similarly at times. I get there and all I can do is focus in on what everyone else is doing and let it discourage me from my own work. I've begun to utilize it as an awareness point and when I do that, I say to myself - Oh, what a great reminder for me to go focus on something I am working on and super excited about bringing into the world and make it even better. Then, I go and do it. Most of the time that works. Hope you find it helpful.

Comparison-itis held me back in my businesses for quite a while. The general antidote has been for me to 1) pay less attention to what other people are doing (hard for someone who LOVES to learn); and 2) really truly find my special sauce and embrace it. Hint: Look for your special sauce behind whatever you are most resisting. That's where I found mine.

Big hugs,
Alexis

By: Nazima Ali

Nazima Ali — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 07:09:52 +0000

I signed up for the 30 Day Challenge as a way of pushing myself ahead to where I knew I could get, where I wanted to get and being the person I know I can be, instead at the beginning of this Challenge I went into a slump. I thought I could swat it aside like an annoying fly but it's stayed – is still here. I've got tons to do, know what I need to do yet I just can't. In the past 2 weeks I've been reading these posts as well as other articles and blog posts. One word that has been coming up consistently from the start of this year has been Truth. After reading your post I get it, be my true self, be true to my needs. I've always struggled with self worth and have been working on this for a while now – the guilt thing was like a 'doh' moment. I've learned and become very self aware and continue to learn. What I'm realizing is that I may be reading and 'getting' some of this stuff but as is the norm for me I'm holding back. Something to do with guilt? Probably. I know I need to go deeper and do more introspection and figure out a different way. I just had another 'aha' moment as I read this post about a behaviour of mine that keeps repeating. Thank goodness I can now figure out a different way to be. Your post made me cry – thank you for giving me so much to think about and to work on.

By: Writergrrl

Writergrrl — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 05:52:41 +0000

Thanks so much for sharing that, Jess. I often also felt out of place even when surrounded by lots of people (I think I remember writing a poem about it a million years ago) – starting by finding one person who 'gets' you, like your boyfriend, is an awesome feeling…like “Finally!” And I have confidence that you will find it more and more often.

You ARE moving forward and sharing a bit more day by day is what its all about – good on ya, girl!!

By: jen.

jen. — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 03:04:27 +0000

Thank you, Dr. Mollie! Funny, I've been “TangentWoman” for about 20 years now!

I guess I have been looking at other ways to be a “mom” for a while, too. Might be avoiding it a bit because I don't really want a consolation prize (I know I am horrible and difficult, or rather that little voice in my head is). My kitties are wonderful in their own right, and my nephews and nieces, and I am an eldest sister, which did give me a lot of “unofficial” nurturing perks. Getting back in touch with long-forgotten or buried life dreams, however, is something I must do, NOW. You raised that flag – I'm gonna go shine!

By: jen.

jen. — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 02:55:25 +0000

Thank you, Deb – and oh my. I am so very sorry for the loss of your sister, and so glad for your niece that she has wonderful YOU to grow and learn with! I am definitely feeling the fire, just have to figure out where it's sparked.

I just realized that if I made a gratitude list it would be huge – better get on sharing those gifts!!