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The Bounceability of Craptastic [Day 26 - 30 Days to Changing Your Game]

This is Day 26 of 30 Days to Changing Your Game. Yesterday Del Jones made us think about ourselves as world citizens who play a distinct role in shaping the journalism we consume. Today, Danny Brown is going to teach how to stop making crap decisions. I’m all ears Danny!

The Bounceability of Craptastic

by Danny Brown (@DannyBrown)

If you’re reading this, it’s because you want to change something in your life. It may be your job; your finances; your outlook; your personal status; your blogging. Heck, it may just be you want to change your reading habits.

But the fact you’re here, reading now, means you want to do something. What you need to do, though is decide if it’s a What you want to change, or a Who. The good news is, they’re both similar so you don’t have to start worrying if you’re making the right decision halfway down the slide. The bad news is that you’re going to have to face up to the Bounceability of Craptastic first.

Say what?

The Bounceability of Craptastic – your inane ability to achive craptastic results from opportunities that are anything but crap. Don’t take it personally – we all do it. Some do it more than others; some a lot less. But, the important part is we all do it – so you’re not alone. All you have to do is find your Bounceability.

Step One – The Pii of Craptastic

Being crap is more than a bad choice – it’s a science. Every decision we make is powered by our brain cells and emotional responses, often to the detriment of the smarter part of our brain that heps us avoid crap. Think of it like deliberately stepping in dog poo in bare feet – we know it’s bad for us, yet still we do it. The same goes for our decisions to walk the Craptastic path.

To avoid this, and start on our way back to Bounceability, we need to work out why we’re making crap decisions and replace with those that are much more beneficial to us. Some ideas include:

  • Make a list of all the bad decisions you’ve made
  • Make a list of what was happening in your life at that time
  • Make a list of any lovers or partners who were with you then
  • Check what month the decision was made (I’ll come back to that shortly)

Once you have this list, you can start to decipher the Pii of Craptastic, or the scientific reason (to you, personally, at least) why you keep making bad decisions. For example, because our emotions often rule our head, we make some of the worst decisions when we’ve just broken up with someone.

This might seem obvious, but yet we still make the same mistakes time and time again. Rebound sex, impulse buys, drunken voice mail messages – you know the drill.

Or weather – we know that many people get depressed in the winter, so make decisions based on cheering themselves up temporarily as opposed to planning for the longer term.

By getting to the Pii of Craptastic, and realizing the science behind our poor decision-making, we move on to the fun part – bouncing!

Step Two – The Bounceability of Craptastic

To move forward in any part of our lives, we need to make the right decisions. Yet the great thing is that we don’t have to make the right ones immediately, as long as we learn from the wrong ones. However, we don’t want to make wrong and crap ones – so when it comes to stepping away from the Craptastic, make time for you:

  • Make a determined effort to wait at least a week before making any major decisions
  • Write a list of pros and cons to the decision and weigh them up within that week
  • Ask yourself if you did the same thing previously and how that worked out for you
  • Google what you’re thinking of (trust me, it works!) and see the general consensus

Ask if it’s something your mother would be proud of

These are just the basics as well, and ones that relate to the Who of your reason for change. Much of it can apply to the What as well, though – often you’ll be substituting people for place, activity or location.

The thing is, as long as you realize you’re on Craptastic Avenue, and you’re willing – truly willing – to get to Bounceability Boulevard, the only thing that’s stopping you is you.

The good news is that you’re obviously ready and willing to start by being here now. So what say you – ready to start bouncing?

dannybrown The Bounceability of Craptastic [Day 26   30 Days to Changing Your Game]

Danny Brown has been providing business branding and emerging media consultancy services to the consumer and commercial markets, from small start-ups to Fortune 500 businesses, for more than 15 years and is currently the Social Media Strategist for Maritz Canada.

He is also founder of the 12for12k Challenge, a unique charity project using social media to change the lives of millions both globally and locally. His blog is featured in the AdAge Power 150 list as well as the Technorati Top 100 Small Business Blogs, and is syndicated across the Social Media Today, WebProNews and Newstex business networks.

If you don’t want to miss out on the 30 Days to Changing Your Game, please sign up here.

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  • Danny, I love the creative genius of this post! One of my craptastic challenges is setting boundaries to preserve my time and further my great objectives in life. A bad decision for me is usually saying yes to something that consumes precious time and then regretting that I didn't decline.

    Something new I'm trying is what I call "goal litmus test." I have some specific career and personal goals so when presented with a new opportunity I ask myself, "Does this get me closer to my goals?" Nine times out of ten, this answer is quite clear.

    You also gave me some additional things to think about so thanks for the inspiration!
  • nazimaali
    Great post and excellent questions. I think stopping and asking ourselves some questions when we're stuck or wanting to make decisions can really clarify things and allow us to make the decisions. The impulse shopping would be no more:)

    Thanks Danny
  • Bravo to you Sarah for your wonderful series of guest writers. It's been a great ride both informative and entertaining.
    But come on Danny Brown, this is too good. I was hoping some of your writing and logic for this one would be crappy, but not the case. I think I'll even go so far as to make you a bit testy by proclaiming this guest post may be one of my fave blogs from you. Tee hee. Seriously though, it's fantastic stuff. Great advice for anyone. Great for me, for sure. This one is a keeper. I'm literally copying it to a word doc for saving. I hope it gets heavily trafficked. Cheers to you both.
  • Ha, thanks Christina :)

    It was great fun writing this, actually - nice to "break from the mould" of the stuff I write about over at my blog, and be more personal, so to speak. Glad you enjoyed, and I hope that Word doc comes in useful :)
  • michaelleiter
    Danny
    A delightful read. And I have a wealth of bad decisions to draw from. Good to think of them as a resource rather than a liability. And I've got some upcoming decisions that are just right to test your system.
    thanks
  • Hey there Michael,

    Thanks fella, and I'd love to know how you get on. Feel free to drop me a line at danny (at) dannybrown (dot) me - god luck!
  • The Pii of craptastic - I love that! This is a very interesting way to help figure out why we all make those wrong choices sometimes! It may not always be because we aren't listening to our 'guts' - but because of some other factors going on! I am definitely going to take the time to write my big whopping wrong choices down and put them to your test and see! :)

    Thanks
  • Hey Shelly, you should patent that - the "Big Whopping Wrong Choices Calculator". I'd buy one! :)

    I think gut factor is definitely a, well, factor in our decisions for sure. But I've tended to find that gut usually leads to right decisions, so that makes me look elsewhere too. Here's to your list being shortened soon :)
  • Excellent post, Danny!

    As I've been reading your post and everyone's comments, basically I've been sitting here thinking of the movie "Groundhog's Day" (yep, that's me - everything seen through the eyes of random movies - lol). You know, where Bill Murray is forced to live the same day over and over and over again until he finally gets it "right". There have certainly been times in my life when I've felt like that character, making the same bad decisions over and over again until I finally stop, figure it out, and move on. Thankfully I've never had to wake up to "I've Got You, Babe" every morning until it happens. ;-)

    No matter how good our intentions are, we can really mess ourselves up by doing this, especially if we've let certain bad decisions evolve over time into habit. No matter how much we long to change some aspect of our lives, we'll keep undermining ourselves again and again until we either give up or get it right.

    Timely reminder, Danny, and thanks to you (and everyone else here) for sharing your wisdom. Even when we finally become aware of making bad choices, it can be hard to refocus. I love the tips that you offer to help break that chain.
  • Maybe everyone's actually living their own Groundhog Day, Mickey. Maybe we're all here on this planet for nothing but continuous learning - about love, people, friends, fun, business, etc. And once we figure out why we're here and how to make it "just so", then we really start living our time here.

    Great movie choice! :)
  • I love that movie. ...."that first step is a D-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-ZIE!"
  • Great movie - I was reading through the quotes earlier and laughing ("Don't drive angry!"). And it's even more fitting since we're in the midst of a blizzard. And Groundhog Day was just a few days ago. Wait. . . uh oh.
  • Time to celebrate all the bad decisions and dumb actions....wow this is going to be one hell of a party. I do believe that to properly embrace all of the good in life, you need to be able to celebrate and understand the bad. Thanks for the reminder.
  • Couldn't have said it better myself, Mark - cheers!
  • You did and do, my friend, that's why you're a gamechanger and I am trying to do as. :)
  • Time for me to get rid of the shovel and invest in a trampoline. Better (and more fun!) to bounce than move crap around. Thanks, Danny, for this wonderfully insightful post.
  • Make sure and send an invite when the Bounce-a-thon begins! :)
  • LaConsuelo
    Hello from Bounceability Boulevard, Danny, and thank you. The most freeing thing anyone ever asked me was "Are you the same person now as when you made what you're calling a "bad" decision?" Oftentimes by taking that step back as you've outlined, I have "V-8" moment, stop bashing myself for being a loser-failure, realize how much I've grown, shake off the weight of that crap and can then bounce forward.

    PS - thanks for calling out my "inane ability to achive craptastic results from opportunities that are anything but crap." Priceless.

    ~Connie
  • Hi there Connie,

    That's a great question to either be asked, or ask yourself. Sometimes we might feel we've moved on but, like you say, we're still the same person so we haven't really. Thanks for that :)
  • StephanieCorum
    I love this post and all the comments that have been made. Like the others, I too have made my share of really awful decisions. Yes, totally crappy ones! And for a while they were repeated behaviors until I got my head screwed on right and started looking within myself for the answers. They were there all the time of course. Now I think about that person from many years ago and I don't even recognize her. I know I will not go back to those patterns of behavior, but I agree it is really good to look at and examine how and why you made the choices you did. I like the idea of googling what I'm thinking about. I'll definitely do that the next time I'm faced with a major choice. Thank you!
  • Just out of curiosity, Stephanie, what was the turning point for you? Was there a specific "A-ha!" moment, or was it gradual?
  • StephanieCorum
    Eventually I realized I either got my act together or I was headed for a total disaster. It wasn't so much of an "A-ha" moment as it was a "Do you really want to live like this?" moment. Getting things turned around was definitely a gradual process. I had a lot of learning and growing to do as a person and that didn't come quickly or easily for me. However, I am really glad I did it!
  • Crap can teach a lot of lessons but, to your point, if we don't see root cause for why we made crappy decisions we'll just keep repeating them. I certainly have - craprriages. Broken the pattern there and in many other places but I still need to keep my eye out for the patterns that can still trip me up. So thanks for the post and reminder.
  • "Craprriages" - LOVE it! :)
  • lorilatimer
    Oh yes, Cherry, it seems that we have to always be on the lookout so those old patterns don't sneak back up on us! Unfortunately they seem to become ingrained in us and it takes a lot of conscious work to be sure they don't make they way back in. You are amazing and I love your blog posts!
  • Kristin
    I love lists, especially this one! It's not easy to think about all the wrong / crap decisions I have made so far (not to think about those still to come...). Guilt aside it really helps to see a pattern and learn from it.
    One thing that pops up immediately is my lack of patience. Whenever I learn about a new project I am head over heels for it and want to start it literally three days ago. Forgotten (at least temporarily) are all the other things that are already on my plate. A few days later I am back down to earth and I realize that I cannot keep all commitments I made if I want to do a good job. Than I have to back off and do damage control.
    So I will take your point with waiting at least a week with major decisions to heart. I love my enthusiasm because I can motivate myself for almost everything. Only the break that keeps me from going over the top has a little malfunction...
  • Hi Kristin,

    I think that's probably one of our biggest "failings" as people - we want everything now. Sometimes this isn't too bad, but other times it just leads us into more trouble. Emotional decisions based on knee-jerk reactions are a prime example - taking a deep breath before speaking or acting has definitely helped me out. Good luck with your own timetable :)
  • Hi Danny,

    Can't speak for my business yet (that's still pretty new), but I sure know what you mean about craptastic decisions in the old personal life! I had a string of sh**ty relationships of one form or another for about the first 15 years of my adult life until I finally stopped and realized that those weren't something happening to me, but a repeated pattern I was choosing for myself for (at the time) unfathomable reasons.

    With a little help, I started to look at & sort those reasons out for the first time and boom! Along came my husband. Now, for the past 5 years, I've enjoyed being one of those insanely happily married people I'd never thought I'd end up being.

    In short, looking back at your decision-making patterns is a really great idea. My business is only two years old, but hey, why wait 15 years to start doing that?

    Thanks,

    Lily
  • Hey there Lily,

    And that's the key pointer right there - the "repeated pattern". Often I wonder if it's because it's a comfort zone - "hey, better the devil you know, right?"

    WRONG.

    Better the knowledge you know to kick that devil in the shins and move on. Here's to you and your husband, and a business that goes to exactly the heights you want it to reach. :)
  • lorilatimer
    In a way this was really hard for me to read because I've made some bad decisions in my life... more than once. You would think that someone who is fairly intelligent would learn, right? I think maybe, just maybe, I finally have. At least with some of the past mistakes. And trust me, some of them have been off the charts in the craptastic department.

    In the past several months I've realized that most of them have been made because I was either a) trying to be what others thought I should be or wanted me to be, or b) looking outside for things instead of looking inside myself. Now that I'm looking inside at what I want and what's best for me, I'm hoping not to repeat some of those things!

    And you are so right... the only thing that's ever stopped me is me. Time to get out of my own way!

    Thanks for this, Danny. You've given me a lot to think about.
  • I love "time to get out of my own way" - classic! :)
  • StephanieCorum
    Lori I'm with you. I've made some huge personal mistakes looking for answers outside instead of inside myself. I look back on them now and wonder who that person was. It is so not the me of today. So yes, you can learn from your mistakes. Keep doing what you're doing!
  • lorilatimer
    I hear you, Stephanie! Who was I then? I've realized that somehow "I" got lost for many years...but the good news is that we both seem to have finally realized it and are back on the right track. I'm glad you're on that track with me!
  • I am with you too, ladies. Give me and oar and I'll row the boat with you!
  • lorilatimer
    Hop on board, Vanessa - there's strength in numbers!
  • StephanieCorum
    Glad to have you on board Vanessa!
  • In business, we never stop learning. How to make a better sale, a better presentation, a better user experience. Yet it's exactly the same in life. We're always learning, and that means we're always making mistakes. The success key is noting the repeats - making the same mistake twice is usually normal, but continuing is definitely a problem. The great thing is seeing that it's us that can make the change.

    Life would be a lot easier if we had an internal mirror that sends us an alert when we're about to mirror a previous mistake! ;-)
  • Oooo. The Pii of Craptastic. I think I need to make the Venn Diagram of Craptastic. I am learning (always) that time of serious craposity (that was for you mckraig!) there is serious overlap of causes. The main one being me not being able to be me. Seems simple. When I understand myself and feel that I am working in line with that understanding, I make fabulous decisions. In times of boneheadedness, I have found that it's because I'm tryign to be someone others wants me to be not what I feel I am. My God, the craptastic decisions that have been made in that state of mind. The mind reels...
  • Ooh, now the Venn diagram sounds intriguing - make sure you share! :)

    It's funny how often we allow peer pressure to guide our decisions too. It's the cheerleader/sports jock conundrum all over. Why do we feel the need that a certain look, feel, persona is the one to be like, or seek approval from. There is no-one better than you. They may be better at math, or hockey, or making paper aeroplanes. But as a person - we are all brilliant individuals. Let's remember that more often.
  • A year and a half a go I read a great book called Eccentric Glamour by a fabulous man who was a window dresser for Barney's. He said the biggest mistake women make is not understand what our style is and not going with it. He broke women down into three style categories and said EMBRACE IT. That's when I realized that I'm pretty funky. I'm funky with music, work, thoughts, decor, style. I have embraced the funky and have been WAY happier ever since. i stopped caring what people would think if I, say, wore a skirt with the Virgin of Guadalupe all over it. You know, the minute I stopped caring and just let myself be, I started getting compliments on a wide array of areas of my life. True story.
  • I bet that is a true story!! It really amazes me sometimes that people try to change themselves to fit into some other category... like wearing clothes that you didn't like... I would imagine that while wearing them, you were uncomfortable and unsure and I KNOW that showed in your walk, your talk, your actions, etc! But when you decided to be yourself... YOU shined! :)
  • I want to see that skirt.
  • Ask and ye shall receive. It IS fabulous. http://www.babygirlboutique.com/paper-doll-holy...
  • Wow, holy great skirt! :)
  • What an awesome skirt!
  • Sounds like a great book. "Embrace" is one of the most overused words vocally, but very underused physically and emotionally - love the fact that a book can offer that difference.
  • Hey Danny, I really like the list you use to start deciphering the Pii of Craptastic . . . those are things I hadn't quite thought about in that way before, but I totally see the connection.

    Interesting and thoughtful, thank you!
  • Hey Nate,

    Took me a long time to see the connections. In hindsight, I guess it should have been almost obvious, yet often the obvious ones are the easiest to miss. An example: I had a great love when I was younger, and she destroyed me emotionally. It took me a long time - LONG time - to realize that most of it wasn't my fault, and why the relationship would have been a negative one with serious repercussions had it continued.

    Seeing that afterward, and learning from it, made a huge difference in the way I approached not just relationships, but many life examples. Lists are good for that ;-)
  • I think it takes most of us a long time to figure out why things happen sometimes - ESPECIALLY if emotions are involved!! Very easy to look back later and say "DUH" - but getting to the conclusions is a definite trip! I think it is great that we have this forum where we can interact and help each other out!
  • Love this. First of all, I love all derivations of the word crap as an adjective. Craptacular (which could be a noun, technically) is also a personal fave.

    What I've learned most from all of these blogposts is the essential need to look inward to affect the outward. It's a real gutcheck, but imperative to moving forward.

    I've got a checklist ahead of me! Many many, thanks for your words today, Danny. :)
  • There's an old saying that to truly love, you need to love yourself first. As cheesy as it sounds, it works. Every time. And there's no crapularity (another one for you!) to that ;-)

    Love to know how you get on with your checklist - happy hunting! :)
  • LOLOL @ crapularity! I'll be smiling for awhile on that one.
  • meganmatthieson
    Oh! That was good! I love all the total non bullshit posts- even though they are CHALLENGING! Thank you for that Danny. I get an email from you- about blogging. Thank you for that too. I've started a new blog and am trying to find my 'voice'....still wondering which direction to go in....really wanting to figure out a way to stay fun, but be meaningful. Both good for an 'audience' but most importantly, make it a reflection of myself and a path to personal and professional growth. Thanks so much for all your shared wisdom!! Megan www.idanceiwrite.com
  • Hey there Megan,

    The great thing about blogging to escape craptastic is the fact you can use it as a sounding board. Not all blogs need to be business, or marketing, or social media. Why not make it "This is what I did today, I need to improve - help?", and open up to your readers. Some folks will obviously be averse to doing this, but if you're brave enough to do so, you'll find your openness and vulnerability will see the help flood in. People react and connect to like minds - we all have questions we need answered. Who better to do so than your immediate tribe, online and off? :)
  • sarahrobinson
    Notes to the Tribe for Friday:

    1. Today’s theme song is Dream by Priscilla Ahn: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKfDwChOoHI
    2. If you like a post please RT it to share it with your Twitter community. Thank you!!

    Love,
    Sarah
  • am I doing something wrong that I don't get emails of the comments? am I the only one? I have to refresh the page to see... so I have probably missed great comments in the older posts! Just thought I'd ask this now as we are nearing the end... LOL
  • Email notices are not instant,I seem to get them about a hour behind, and I think you only get them about replies to your posts/replies.
  • I haven't gotten ANY - not one... so i must have something messed up!
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