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An Irresistible Presence Grows As You Live the Golden Rule [Day 14 – 30 Days to CIP]

July 14th, 2010

This is Day 9 of 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence.  On Monday, Chris Guillebeau gave us the VERY simple formula for creating irresistible presence and WOW did you all move out to put it into practice!. Today, Gini Dietrich paints an amazing picture of the role GENEROSITY plays in creating irresistible presence. Read on!

Today’s theme song: Send Me on My Way by Rusted Root:

An Irresistible Presence Grows As You Live the Golden Rule

by Gini Dietrich (@GiniDietrich)

On June 30, Matt Lauer had Elizabeth Edwards on The Today Show to talk about life, family, her revised book as it comes out in paperback, criticism she’s received, and what she thinks about her ex-husband’s love child. Before seeing her interview, I’m not sure I would have been able to clearly articulate what creating irresistible presence really means. And then I watched her, with complete fascination and respect, as she answered tough, tough questions with confidence, class, and ease.

When asked if she regrets having married John Edwards, she said things didn’t turn out the way she would have hoped, but she didn’t regret her marriage. When asked about the criticism she received from the Edwards campaign office, she said didn’t realize the staff didn’t see her as an equal, but as the candidate’s wife, which put her on a lower playing field.

She also said knowing how she is perceived, as much as she wants people to like her, is really helpful in her own personal growth. When asked how she was feeling, she commented she’s on a new chemotherapy regimen and she hopes, the next time she is on television, it’s to talk about one of her passions. Not once did she badmouth the campaign staff, her ex-husband, or his mistress.

At the end of the interview, I posted on Facebook that I can only hope I am as humble and classy as she is, especially when confronted with conflict.  No matter what your politics, what you think about what she may or may have not known during the campaign, or what you think of the scandal, it’s pretty difficult not to respect and admire the way she has created an irresistible presence.

Creating Your Irresistible Presence

We live in a day and age that almost anyone can become a seemingly overnight sensation. With reality shows, social networking, self-publishing, blogging, and Internet radio and TV, the playing field is level and we have the opportunity to build ourselves into experts around our passions. With that come ego boosts and a heightened sense of ability, plus conflict and confrontation. It also comes with an immense amount of responsibility: A responsibility to ourselves, to our families, to our friends, to our colleagues, to our clients, to our competition, and even to our nemeses.

Our responsibility is to be our authentic selves without compromising our values. Yet many of us are scared to be human, to show our weaknesses and our flaws.  It’s scary…being yourself, especially if (like Elizabeth Edwards and me, too) you have a need to be liked.

I genuinely care about what people think of me and it really hurts my feelings when someone who doesn’t know me talks badly about me off- or online. But I am 100 percent true to myself and to my values and, though my feelings get hurt, that helps me focus on the positive relationships in my life.

And that is what creating your irresistible presence is all about. For me, it’s important I help others, I pay it forward as often as I can, I recognize the strengths in my network, I pump up people, I acknowledge everyone who comes into my world, and I never get too big for my britches.

How I do those things is pretty simple:

  • I am overly obsessed at answering every email I receive;
  • I respond to every tweet myself;
  • I read and comment on other’s blogs;
  • I respond to all of the comments on our blog;
  • I recommend people, blogs, and books I love;
  • I go out of my way to find one thing I have in common with people who pop into my online world;
  • I never say no (which I don’t recommend!); and
  • I recognize people publicly and privately consistently.

We are always eager to help those who have helped us without asking for anything in return. I’m a big believer in treating people the way you want to be treated and, if you do, you soon will emulate Elizabeth Edwards with a classy, humble, confident, easy presence others find completely irresistible.

P.S. If you’d like to see tidbits of the Elizabeth Edwards interview, you can see it on The Young Turks (pretty appropriate for Sarah’s blog, don’t you think??).

Gini’s Bio

Gini Dietrich is the founder and chief executive officer of Arment Dietrich, Inc., a firm that uses non-traditional marketing in a digital world. The company’s blog, Spin Sucks, is the 2010 Readers Choice PR Blog of the Year.

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The Secret Formula for Irresistible Presence [Day 12 – 30 Days to CIP]

July 12th, 2010

This is Day 12 of 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence.  On Friday, Lou Bortone gave us some great ways to build an Irresistible Brand (what we all want, right?!) and some AWESOME action steps for maximizing online video branding. Today, the one and only Chris Guillebeau gives us THE formula (seriously!) for Creating Irresistible Presence. This post alone is worth the price of admission. 🙂

Today’s Song is: Brass In Pocket by The Pretenders: (Chris let me pick – couldn’t help myself!)

The Secret Formula for Irresistible Presence

by Chris Guillebeau (@ChrisGuillebeau)

You’ve probably heard the secret to getting noticed: do something amazing! Do something remarkable! Then the world will be at your door.

Like a lot of general statements, there’s some truth in the be amazing theory. If you’re not doing something worth talking about, most people who don’t already know you won’t really care what you’re up to. The thing is, though, simply being noticed doesn’t take you very far. Celebrities and reality TV participants are noticeable, but we don’t always like them or want to emulate them.

To escape mediocrity and embrace excellence, you’ll want to pursue a higher goal: the goal of creating irresistible presence. To become irresistible, you have to be more than amazing—you have to be generous as well.

Here’s the formula:

Amazing + Generous = Irresistible

Being generous is all about giving. It’s about combining an internal compass with an external focus. You need the internal compass to guide your work. No one else can tell you what you’re about and what you should do. But the internal compass joins with an external focus that has you continually looking around and asking, “How can I make someone else look good? How can I create positive change?”

An external focus means you give more than you take; you reach out more than you bring in. “How can I help you?” is a good starter question to ask people with your external focus, but “Can I help you do x, x, or x?” is even better.

You’ll Never Be Irresistible to Everyone

Welcoming new members of your tribe—but also gently filtering, to make it clear who might be better served elsewhere—will help you cultivate the irresistible presence over time. Hopefully you’ll also wake up excited every day, eager to begin working on meaningful relationships and the craft that you love.

Are you being amazing and generous today?


Chris Guillebeau travels the world and writes for a small army of remarkable people at Follow his live updates from every country in the world at

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Creating an Irresistible Presence Starts with an Irresistible Brand! [Day 9 – 30 Days to CIP]

July 9th, 2010

This is Day 9 of 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence.  On Wednesday, Elizabeth Marshall gave us four ways to STAND OUT as a messenger/author w/ a powerful message. Today, Lou Bortone rounds out our week beautifully as he gives us some great ways to build an Irresistible Brand (what we all want, right?!) and some AWESOME action steps for maximizing online video branding. Great stuff!!

Creating an Irresistible Presence Starts with an Irresistible Brand!

By Lou Bortone @loubortone

Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.” – Robert Frost

Today’s theme song: “What’s love got to do with it?” – Tina Turner

Ah, to be irresistible…  To have that certain something that makes you impossible to resist.  Call it charisma, call it personality, call it attraction, allure, appeal… By any name it’s something we all long for.  Yet, when it comes to creating an irresistible presence in business, it’s something that can be elusive.

To develop an irresistible presence, you first must build an irresistible brand.  I know, easier said than done, right?   But the rewards of having an irresistible brand are well worth the effort.  A strong brand makes you unique and memorable, and helps you stand out and be heard in a sea of wanna-be’s and copycats.

So where do you begin your quest to build an irresistible brand?  A catchy slogan? A kick-ass website?  A cool logo?  A fabulous Facebook fan page?  Sure, those are all necessary ingredients, but they are only building blocks to developing a compelling brand.

Many small businesses have it backwards.  They rush to put up a website and have a logo designed, only to realize later that they have left out a crucial step:  How to distinguish themselves from their competition with a strong brand.

Oftentimes, entrepreneurs will contact me about creating a video to market their business, when they have yet to even define their brand.  While online video is an excellent tool for building a brand, you’ve got to have your foundation already in place.

Fortunately, as a “Book Yourself Solid” Certified Coach, I use some of Michael Port’s tried and true principles to help entrepreneurs create breakthrough brands that help them stand out from the crowd.  Here is the five step system I use when helping clients to create an irresistible brand:

  1. Develop a “who & do what” statement – The “who” is your target market and the “what” is the primary benefit they get from you.  For example, my “who and do what” is: “I help entrepreneurs build breakthrough brands on the Internet so that they can get more clients!”Whereas, my Uncle Vito’s might be “I help deadbeat debtors find their checkbooks so nobody gets hurt.” You get the idea…
  2. Define your “why you do it” statement – The “why” is the reason you do what you do.  It’s what you stand for.  It’s important because it’s what will attract the right clients to you. My “why” is: “Turning struggling entrepreneurs into Online Rock Stars!”  Uncle Vito’s why is to make sure his boss gets paid by any means necessary. To each his own!
  3. Focus on building relationships – Social networking and video are similar in that they are tools to help build relationships on the web.  You gotta give before you get!  Engage, contribute, share… Build your social capital and work on developing trust and credibility. When you put relationships first, social media can become a great resource for developing your online brand.
  4. Maximize social media and online video – Entrepreneurs can rapidly accelerate the branding process by using social media and online video strategically.  Make every tweet count.  And don’t stop with Twitter and Facebook.  Video is social, too! For example, YouTube has become an enormously powerful business tool for creating connections, demonstrating your expertise and enhancing your online visibility.
  5. Use Online Video to stand out and be noticed – As a long-time “video guy,” I’m especially partial to video as a resource to break out of the pack and be noticed.  Online Video builds an immediate connection and makes you memorable.  It enhances your online visibility and it works for you world-wide, 24/7.  Online Video is quickly becoming the ultimate brand-builder.

In fact, video is my favorite tool for creating and irresistible brand.  So, to help encourage you to take action and get started, I’ve listed five simple ways to tackle video marketing today:

5 Easy Ways to Take Action Now with Online Video Branding:

Pick the Low Hanging Fruit – Start with the easiest way to record a quick video.  Fire up your webcam and record a brief, 30-second welcome message for your website visitors.  Tell them who you are and how you can help them.  Keep it short and simple.  Done is better than perfect!  Repeat as necessary.

Got 12 seconds? – Good. Then go to and open a free account.  Turn on your webcam and talk for 12 seconds – no more, because that’s all they give you! is like Twitter for video. Brevity is a must; so just record a quick hello or a brief tip. Congratulations, you’ve done a video!  You can even share your 12 second video masterpiece to YouTube or social media sites.

I Stream, You Stream – We all stream at Ustream!  Video streaming, that is – also known as live webcasting., another free web resource, makes it possible for you to have your own web TV channel in a matter of minutes.  Open an account, grab your trusty webcam, and you can shoot video live and on the fly.  When you’re ready for viewers, Ustream lets you tweet your broadcast link to Twitter faster than you can say “Action!”

Flip Out – If you’re out and about or on the go, portable pocket cameras like the popular Flip Video camera make video a snap.  The Flip camera couldn’t possibly be any easier to use, and they’re fun, convenient and affordable.   For an even easier mobile solution, check your phone!  Many mobile phones have a video function, with Apple’s iPhone to be leading the way.  On my iPhone, I can now shoot, edit and upload video to YouTube in a flash. Amazing!

Camera shy? Not quite ready for your close-up?  That’s fine, because you can still create your own video message with little more than text and photos at  Animoto makes video quick and painless.  Just upload a few photos, add a bit of text, select some music from Animoto’s diverse collection, and you’re good to go!  Animoto does all the techie stuff, so you can have your own video montage in moments.

Now you’ve got no excuse not to revitalize your brand with online video!  Remember, with an irresistible brand, you’ve got the foundation for an irresistible presence.  And you gotta love that!

Lou Bortone is an Online Branding Specialist and video pro who helps entrepreneurs and coaches build breakthrough brands on the Internet, so they can have more visibility, credibility and profitability.  Lou’s clients get more business and make more money, because Lou assists them with innovative online branding strategies, including social media marketing and online video consulting.

Lou is a former television executive who worked for E! Entertainment Television and Fox in Los Angeles.  He is also an author and ghostwriter of six business books, a Certified Guerrilla Marketing Coach and a Book Yourself Solid Certified Coach.

Lou’s signature programs include “Online Branding Blueprint,” and “Video in a Day!”  His website is at


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30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence is sponsored  by

Creating Irresistible Presence LIVE
~September 23 -25 ~ Atlanta GA ~
To learn more, please visit

Super-Affordable 3-pay option expires July 31

The Messenger Behind the Message [Day 7 – 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presesence]

July 7th, 2010

This is Day 7 of 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence.  On Monday, Reese Spykerman gave us back so many incredibly valuable pieces of ourselves.  Elizabeth Marshall takes the spotlight today as she draws out the relationship between Creating Irresistible Presence and integrating your message with WHO you are as a messenger!  A must read if you want to stand out as a thought leader.

The Messenger Behind the Message

by Elizabeth Marshall | @lizmarshall

I don’t know about you, but I’m a big fan of Behind the Music.

In case you don’t know what I’m talking about, its the TV series that gives you the “inside story” about the musicians and bands behind all those pop/rock songs you love – and know by heart.

Each 60-minute episode features a different artist or band and tells the story of the struggles, hardships and life circumstances they faced along the road to success.  Along with the challenges, you get the inside scoop on their “big break” and defining moments that allowed them to go from no-name artist to pop culture superstar.

As the story unfolds over the hour-long episode, you also get a feel for the personality, worldview, values and overall character (or lack thereof) of that artist you love – or think you love – so much.

In other words, you get a glimpse of the musician behind the music…

At the end of the show, you either feel more drawn to their music or…well, less drawn to it as a result of peeking behind the curtain.

After all, it’s not just about the music, but about the artist and musicians who actually created it.  That person behind the song or album can either reinforce your love of their work or cause you to rethink why you liked them in the first place.

This is especially true if you imagine what it would be like to personally interact with your favorite pop star (as opposed to watching them on the screen).  Do you see yourself inviting them to dinner with friends, hosting them as a guest in your home, or even doing business with them in some way?

Here’s where it gets interesting…

Many of these pop/rock stars, as well as the celebrities, gurus, politicians, experts and leaders we like to follow (and even admire) from afar are not the same people we want to include in our everyday lives and in our business projects.  All judgments aside, there’s a difference between the people we follow out of fascination and interest and the people we actually turn to and trust for advice and guidance on how to grow our businesses and shape our lives to align with our vision and values.

But, when it comes to things like music, we don’t always care about the musician behind it all – or, at least, we don’t let their story derail us from listening to our favorite songs.

So, does the musician behind the music matter or not? I can see it both ways.

On the one hand, I proudly admit to liking a fair number of 80s hair-band ballads, rock anthems and hip-hop tunes by artists I don’t see myself inviting to my home for dinner – or seeking out for business or life advice. On the other hand, I must also admit to throwing away $700 worth of CDs (as a result of a brief phase I went through in college) after deciding the musician behind the music DID matter.

Now, let’s take this conversation another direction and apply it to this crazy online world of entrepreneurship and thought leadership we all inhabit.

Imagine there was a series like Behind the Music, except it wasn’t focused on music or artists at all, but on the world of ideas, messages and thought leadership.

In fact, it could be a show called “Behind the Message,” featuring your favorite authors, messengers, though leaders, and entrepreneurs, and give you the inside scoop on the ups and downs they’ve faxed along the path to success.  But, the show wouldn’t just chronicle the circumstances and situations they faced; instead, it would pull back the curtain on WHO they are as people – including whether they are authentic, generous, likeable and true to their message…or not…or some variation in between.

Now, if you could watch a show like my made-up Behind the Message series, would it:

  • Impact which messengers and thought leaders you choose to listen to and follow?
  • Change the way you feel about your favorite book or blogger?

In meeting and working with hundreds of authors and messengers personally (including many bestsellers), my experience is that the messenger behind the message DOES matter.

But, here’s the REAL question we should be asking ourselves…

Instead of watching our favorite blogger/messenger/author on the screen, imagine if our fans, followers and readers could watch a Behind the Messenger episode about US.

Would they like what they saw?  Would they want to follow us, buy our book, or hire us after getting the inside scoop about the WHO behind the message?

From where I sit, Irresistible Presence is about more than just your message (or book, brand, idea or business), but about YOU, the messenger.

In fact, creating Irresistible Presence happens when you have a:

  1. Message worth hearing – one that makes an impact on those who hear it
  2. Essence worth following – and overall BEINGnesss others want to be around

Granted, it’s important to have a compelling message.  In an overcrowded marketplace, you DO want your book and message to make a contribution – instead of adding to the noise.

But, assuming you have something great to say (which I know you do), your ESSENCE (or being-ness) makes all the difference in terms of whether your message is received – or discounted, dismissed or ignored.

You create Irresistible Presence when the messenger BEHIND the message is just as attractive (or even more so) than the message itself.

Although this Essence is not something you can buy, borrow, manufacture, steal or fake – like character, you either have it or you don’t – it is something you can cultivate and foster.

So, how do you take steps to strengthen your Essence?

Let’s take Les McKeown as an example of Irresistible Presence…

He’s got a compelling message – one that I truly believe every entrepreneur, business owner and leader needs to hear – and a GREAT book, Predictable Success. By itself, his message is making a difference.  In fact, thought leader David Allen read his book and immediately saw the value in applying his Predictable Success process to his business – quite a testimonial.  In addition, his book was recently named as a Wall Street Journal and US Today bestselling book!

That’s all fine and good, but the best part is getting to know the messenger behind the message.

Les is generous, authentic, and inspiring…I could go on.

Sadly, that’s more than I can say about some of the authors (including bestsellers) and thought leaders I’ve come to know over the past few years.

But, rather than lament that fact, let’s use Les as an example of 4 different ways you can cultivate a compelling Essence and Irresistible Presence:

1)    Are you a Go-Giver?

To borrow a concept from my colleague and friend, author Bob Burg, Les is definitely a Go-Giver. He’s generous and willing to give first, without expecting something in return.  Because of this attitude and mindset, he’s quickly built a loyal following and quality network of colleagues and strategic partners.  Because of WHO he is, colleagues and strategic partners GLADLY stepped up to support him during his book launch.

2)    How’s Your Likeability Factor?

Aside from being generous, Les is an all-around likeable guy.  In fact, he embodies the four personality traits that author Tim Sanders says contribute to our overall likeability – friendliness, relevant (being tuned into others’ interests or needs), empathy and realness (or authenticity).  To be clear, likeability is not about being fake or putting on a mask, but looking for ways you can be more kind, relevant and real – looking to Les as a great example of how your Likeability the spark to ingite the speed at which your message spreads!

3)    Are you Aligned With Your Message (aka Practicing What You Preach)?

Unlike some messengers who preach one thing and practice another, Les lives and breathes the practice of Predictable Success.  He applies the principles he uses with clients to his own business and life.  Because he’s aligned with his message, he’s not only a more attractive messenger, but a more credible one!

By the way, I could say the same about our dear Sarah Robinson 🙂 But, you already know that!

4)    Are You Willing to Admit Your Mistakes?

Although it’s generally accepted that “no one is perfect,” it’s not easy to admit mistakes and “own up” when you fall down.  It takes a dose of courage and humility to publicly say, “I screwed up,” which is exactly what Les was willing to do when his website went down during my call I hosted with him, Michael Port and David Allen.  Instead of making excuses, he instead made a joke about how he could have used the Predictable Success process to insure the website was prepared for the volume of traffic that day – increasing his Likeability Factor and making him more trustworthy in the eyes of those listening to the call.

Although there are many additional ways you can strengthen your Essence, here are four areas you can cultivate right away, so I encourage you to pick one of these and start cultivating away!

I don’t know about you, but I’m taking this post as an opportunity to polish up and strengthen my own Essence, as I believe we always have room to grow.

Want to join me?

– – –

Elizabeth Marshall is dedicated to helping messengers spread their message and sell their books.  She does that through her coaching, teleseminars, and out-of-the-box workshops, like Book Breakthrough NYC –

You can learn more about her by going to

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30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence is sponsored  by

Creating Irresistible Presence LIVE
~September 23 -25 ~ Atlanta GA ~
To learn more, please visit

Super-Affordable 3-pay option expires July 31

The Sweet & Sour Lessons of Creating Something Irresistible that Sells & is WORTH Selling [Day 2 – 30 Days to CIP]

July 2nd, 2010

Welcome to Day 2 of 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence.  Yesterday, we got kicked off with a post about Preparation AND a nifty contest with prizes!! Today, the one and only Andrea J. Lee knocks it out of the park as she connects Creating Irresistible Presence to Making MONEY. Hot stuff indeed. 🙂

Today’s song is: Hot Hot Hot by Buster Poindexter:

The Sweet & Sour Lessons of Creating Something Irresistible that Sells & is WORTH Selling

by Andrea J. Lee | @andreajlee

“In that shimmering space between slumbering and awake, before it knows to be anything else, lives your true self.”

It’s no coincidence that in Sarah’s introduction of the Creating Irresistible Presence series, somehow, I got introduced as Sherman Hu.

I mean, we do look a little alike, really.  Have a look for yourself. <Shameless photo op!>

There are lots of things I could say about growing up first generation Asian-Canadian, but there are two that relate especially well to this idea of presence, how to find it, and why we we might care.

1. Within a homogenized world – for example, Chinese school every Saturday for 10 years with 100 other ‘me-types’ – you learn that you have to try quite a bit, in order to stand out.

2. Within a non-homogenized world – for example, the city of Vancouver before 1980, when less than 10% of the population was Asian – you still have to try to stand out (and up!) for yourself, because otherwise people have made a decision about you before you’ve even opened your mouth.

In other words, no matter where we find ourselves in this moment, because of things like what Malcolm Gladwell wrote about in Blink, if you and I don’t insist on ourselves, we won’t get seen.  And if we don’t get seen, won’t it be as if we might as well not have lived?

Raging against the demons of sameness, dullness and unoriginality – I believe in the power of AND (my name IS Andrea, after all.)

This is where I could insert something about how we all have different fingerprints, and there will never be another human being like you, and all of that would be true.

But instead, because Sarah inspires practical wisdom, let me share a hands-on exercise that I hope you’ll try. It has to do with the word AND.

Stay with me here, because this leads to something cool for you to come back to (sometimes during tough times, when things feel the stuckest) for both YOU as a person and YOU as a business owner who wants to inspire your market, and make the money you want to make doing it.

In keeping with our theme, let’s take the concept of ‘sweet and sour’ first.

In the beginning there was sour. Think lemons, vinegar, green apples.

And then, there was sweet. Honey. A piece of liquorice. A perfectly ripe peach.

But what if we wave the Magic Wand of AND for a moment, and combine those things?

Sweet AND sour.


Yes, you got it! Suddenly, a whole world of culinary delights is revealed. 🙂

What does this have to do with you, your business and your presence?

You and I are a mess of combinations. In living human form, each of us is a mix that’s never existed before. And, you’re also a blank slate waiting for new, consciously-selected combinations.*

So let’s start by working it from the basics.

Step #1: Start listing the elements of who you are, what you like and what you do when no one is looking.

For me, this looks like:

Asian, oldest child, long baths, big piles of books beside the bath, dislikes cooking but has a limitless supply of great food analogies, Gemini, writes to think

For Sarah, I could start with:

lives in Atlanta, music from the 80s, classically trained Shakespearian actress

(Go on ahead and list a few for Sarah, just to get warmed up now.)

Step #2: Next list the elements of what YOUR BUSINESS is, what people naturally buy from you, and ask you for help with.

Again, using me for example:

innovations and future trends, ideas for businesses that define their category, the fastest path to 6 and 7-figure income

And again with Sarah, I’d start with things like:

busting out of ordinary thinking, calling BS so resistances melts, lighting the fire of courage, calling forth the real you

And now, your turn. What do your 2 lists look like?

Take your time, and start with the obvious.  No answer is too small or silly-seeming. You could start posting in the comments, and everyone else can help.  Because I hate to break it like this, but the secret’s out. Everyone knows this is one of the tightest tribes that lives and breathes online, and I have it from reliable sources that many of you know each other really, really well. That’s extra cool because it can help to have other eyes on this list-making exercise.

Plus, if you’re new here, you can get folks to give their first impression of you, from your website or twitter profile. This safe environment is actually a fantastic place to do it.

And if you get stuck, I’m sure Sarah wouldn’t mind being used as a guinea pig some more, right Sarah?  ☺

A real-life business example, freshness personified.

Take a wedding planner entrepreneur I’ve worked with before. She was doing well, puttering along in her arena but wanting to grow.  Her first list looked like this:

artist, Virgo, fashion magazines, decorating her apartment, partying/going out on the town

And her second looked like this:

wedding planning, photography, finding venues

So far, so good, right?

In an ordinary world, where no one thinks outside the box, it would be normal to think, oh she should just keep trying to grow her wedding planning business. Or, if she were to try a new business, open a stylist or party planning business. Straight up, perfectly fine ideas, but the problem is…these are the within-the-lines ideas that 1000s of other people have.

And because of that, they’re sort of non-ideas. Like so many people, she’d have to fight to get heard in an sea of look-alikes! How to get out of all that homogeneity and escape mediocrity?!

If she had stuck with ordinary, she would have spent a whole lotta life trying to stand out in a crowded market and get heard by the people who want to pay her, and pay her handsomely. You know, the reason to be in business at all?

Here’s where new combinations come in. Where we get to surf the future, create value where – not a moment before – there was nothing.

Just before meeting me, this same entrepreneur experienced the power of a live training event, one like the one Sarah’s got planned later this fall, for business owners like you and I. Bam! Said entrepreneur got the fresh combination bug and combined wedding planning (sour) with business event planning (sweet) and now has the most hot-damn, cooking-amazing, unbeatably magnetic –

luxury business-event management company

that treats its clients so well they feel like brides

Sweet AND sour in ALL its glory. And rapid leap to 7-figure business.

Can you feel the essential pieces of you, and who you are, thrumming at the notion of coming together in a business formation as compelling, unique, and worthy-of-excellent-income as this?

It does take courage.

Are you glad, even though you don’t know her, that Ms. Luxury Event Planner took the leap? Took the time to examine who she was, including all the various, glorious, seemingly-disparate pieces, CELEBRATED it, and combined it in an irresistible way?

That’s what happens when an entrepreneur creates an irresistible business from the realness of who she is. Can you also see that in this example, she’s now reached the other side? She’s innovated her business through her presence, and done it in a way that can’t be copied? Well, it can, but not authentically, you see? Because then the copycats become the ones that are fighting to be heard.

Now THAT is a business worth going out and getting lots of customers for.

The essence of who we are isn’t one thing, thank God. With this knowledge, we get to craft the landscape of our businesses in the image of ourselves. The future can look very different from the past.

So much has changed in our lives, society, etc, that it’s almost silly to say it.  But I say it because I want us to see that flux as the malleable moment that it is, that puts the power in OUR hands, to create what we want. If one business like the biz-event-bride business can change the playing field, what could 100 businesses? 1000?

To start creating YOUR irresistible presence, think about the elements of who you are.

And then, take those pieces and move them around, overlap them, combine them in new ways, being open to surprising even yourself.

Your task is to use the power of AND to identify YOUR sweet and your sour, and see what you can conjure, with a little help from your unmediocre friends.

Some more examples, because those always help me, maybe they will you too:

– A trained teacher who loves cell phones >> A business that helps people create strong teachable curriculum that will be delivered via mobile devices

– A really smart former online assistant with a recruitment background >> A business that helps online companies build awesome teams

– A mom of adopted twins and former lawyer >> A business that helps future adoptees navigate that crazy legal labyrinth

– A real estate agent and rabid fan of Harlequin romance novels >> A business that makes the love match between home buyer and home

Once you start to see the world through the lens of one-of-a-kind never-to-be-repeated combination, I bet you’ll be reporting in all manner of examples, so I’ll leave the rest of the list to you.

Unplug that umbilical cord…

You see, this is only the first of 30 days worth of reprogramming for you, where you get to stop thinking the way you’ve maybe been TOLD you should think. When asked what they think – this is one of things I rage against – too many people have no idea. Sadly, it’s usually something to do with the last thing they read, or the last TV show they saw.  How many people do you think believe Disney’s rendition of who Pocahontas was??

Original, independent thinking is becoming a lost art.  Which is why I’m so curious about how all this lands with you. What do you think?

In case of emergency.

Since I’m on a roll with self-disclosure, revealing ancient connections with my brother Sherman and all (Sherman actually will be posting later this month, I believe) let me start wrapping this up with one of my most favorite quotes.

That is, assuming you wanna know what I do when I’m in a deep, dark funk, having a streak of feeling like a sheep, at the mercy of the rules and opinions of others, helpless to make a difference, even the tiniest, no matter how hard I want to? LOL. Alright, here’s the quote I keep under glass, to break in case of emergency:

“Most people are walking around, umbilical cord in hand, looking for a new place to plug it in.” – Cavett Robert

Boy, that one sure wakes me up, even as I type it. I feel as if I were Neo in the movie The Matrix, when the vertebrae in his spine go pop, pop, pop, and he detaches from the big machine.

Is it time for you to unplug now (more fully/all the way/for the first time) too?

In summary.

Your presence, the one that you’ve committed to (at least over the next 30 days) woo, coax, polish and finally to ROAR from the hilltops about… is the sum total of you. It’s the Betty White inside, that Sarah talks about.

Breaking it down into its parts first is going to be an excellent step. Then putting it all back together in a way that makes business sense in a way your people want will be the next.  Reverse those and I promise you’ll be undoing a lot of things later.

Because when you do it like this, the essence of your business becomes undeniable, something that no one can take away from you.  Rather than something that you cobble together from a pile of should outside of yourself.

When I get asked, as I often do, to answer the question…

“Andrea, how do I get this thing (blog, ebook, membership site, live event, whatever) to SELL more, cuz I love what I do but I also need to make MONEY?”

My answer is, invariably…

“Have something amazing to say first.”

The secret to having something amazing to say first? Uncover your presence.

Last but not least.

“Let us not disrespect – or underestimate – the power of a single great idea, well monetized, to change the world.”

You’re going to hear so much wisdom (nuts and bolts, big picture, whimsy & pragmatics) about presence this month, with chances to work on it from every angle this way to Sunday.  And once you’ve stretched these muscles around your irresistible presence — the business part, and the income parts, are going to come oh-so-much-more stably, capable of withstanding competition, throbbing with promise. With much less wasted effort.

I’m deeply grateful for this, because if the amount of info-crap in our world is any indication, we are in sore need of original thinking, innovation and the un-mediocre. Sore. Need.

So thank you. For your commitment, every day, to all that you do. And to playing full out this 30 days.  And thank you, too, Sarah,  you Shakespearian actress who knows a thing or two about being REAL, and leaving it ALL onstage, night after night, every night, in front of audiences who want ALL of you…and who’ll either throw garbage at you or… in an incandescent moment…leap to their feet, clapping thunderously!!

Wait a second. No wonder I’m excited about you, in the way only you can, bringing us this 30-day series about presence!

I’ll leave you all with the above list-making exercise and a few extra thoughts to put in a nice 30-day crock-pot:

Remember, learning is what happens when you (really) don’t know what to do.

What can ONLY you do?

How much good can you do with that, through your business, making a great living as you do?

And if you’re afraid of failing, well, I say you may as well fail for being you, because it would so suck to fail at pretending to be someone else!

I agree with what Seth says. We need you to lead us. We also need you to think for yourself. And then we need you to lead us where only you can, being who only you can be.

Andrea J. Lee is an entrepreneurial futurist with her finger on the pulse of the entrepreneurial spirit and how it can be harnessed to benefit everyone. Throughout her life, Andrea’s done one thing – help those she loves make money.

In case you wondered about all the food analogies, her husband is a trained chef. You can learn more about Andrea at (She and Sherman Hu are unrelated.)

30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence is sponsored  by

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30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence ~ Let's GO! [Day 1 – 30 Days]

July 1st, 2010

Yay!! Today is the day we kick off 30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence and I am BEYOND excited!!

Que theme music: Simply Irresistible by Robert Palmer (hey – I’m an 80’s girl!)

As I did for my last 30 Day Series, I want to use today to do some prep work that will help us all make the most of this experience. Remember, I’ve read most of the posts that are coming your way so I know what is in store for us. :-)

And yes – this will look very familiar to you alums of 30 Days to Changing Your Game.

Here is the most significant thing I can say (and I believe those of you who went through 30 Days to Changing Your Game will agree):

Over the next 30 days we will be creating new habits and new ways of thinking. At first, it may feel unfamiliar and awkward – and that’s ok. Change can feel like that. Other times it may feel frightening and disorienting – and that’s okay. Change can feel like that. And still other times it may feel  liberating and freeing – and that’s ok. Change can feel like that, too.

“Luck is where opportunity meets preparation.” Denzel Washington

The seven keys below will anchor us in the coming days (and even when this series is over) and will truly make all the difference. So, here we go.

1) Commit. Show up here ever Monday, Wednesday and Friday for the next 30 days. If you are serious about creating irresistible presence, you’ve got to step up. I know you are busy. So am I. But I’ve learned that if I want to be powerful when I step onto that stage, I’ve got to be willing to do whatever it takes. So today, decide.

2) Get a notebook or a legal pad that is dedicated to this 30 day series. You may even want to get a three -ring binder and some loose-leaf paper so you can print out and save each blog post. Every day you will be asked to take a small action toward changing your game. You’ll need some space to write down your thoughts and your responses. This may be the very excuse you need to finally buy a Moleskin. :-)

3) Ask questions. Each blog post author is available on the day of their post to respond to comments and answer questions. Take advantage of having access to this extraordinary group of men and women. And remember, the only stupid question is the one that remains unasked.

4) Connect with each other. Many of you recruited a partner for 30 Days -which is AWESOME!! And if you haven’t, it’s not too late to do that, but you will be fine if you haven’t. The culture here at Escaping Mediocrity is one of a tribe. We learn from and lean on each other.

To that end, connect with those you may not know. Respond to an interesting comment. Ask the commentor a question.  Together we are powerful. (And here is one of my few ground rules: this is a supportive environment. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. If you get personal or overly snarky, I will call you out and ban you. End of story.)

Twitter is acting funky, but I am building a list of 30 Day CIP Participants. To be sure you are on it, tweet about the series using the hashtag #CIP. You will find that list here:

I am also making a list of the guest bloggers here:

5) Remember that some posts will resonate more strongly with you than others. Many times I’ve found that the thing that I was certain had no value to me was the very thing that turned me around. So play through each day. You never know where it may lead you.

6) Stay the course. Somewhere about mid-way through this thing, people will start dropping off. It’s just what happens. Decide now that you won’t be one of those people. Academy Award winners stay in the game.

7) Go easy on yourself. Yes I know I said decide, commit, step up. And I still mean that. I also know that change can be exhausting and doesn’t come as easily as we would like sometimes. You can’t force it; you can only allow it. And take really good care of your self in the process. :-)

Ya’ll better rest up. Tomorrow the one and only Andrea Lee takes the stage. It’s gonna be epic.

LET”S GO!!!!!!

P.S. If you aren’t already signed up and don’t want to miss out on  30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence, please sign up here.

30 Days to Creating Irresistible Presence is sponsored  by

Creating Irresistible Presence LIVE
~September 23 -25 ~ Atlanta GA ~
To learn more, please visit

Super-Affordable 3-pay option expires July 31